Xi’an (or Shan) is one of my favorite characters in the Marvel Universe (closely behind bitchy Emma Frost and virtuous Kitty Pryde, who should be a librarian, btw). Besides working as a librarian (notably, the University of Chicago), she is also one of the very few out lesbians in comics. A founding member of the New Mutants, she came to the US as a Vietnamese refugee, in the process witnessing her father’s and mother’s murders and herself surviving rape. She was left alone to fight her evil twin brother and raise her younger siblings but oh-ho, dear readers, she is not alone! She is an X-Man!!  As a mutant, Karma can possess people’s minds and make them do pretty much whatever she wants them to. Which pretty much rules.

She’s gone through a lot of different looks through the years. First Karma looked old:

Then she looked like she was 23 and was into beer and random ladies:

Yes, that is totally a naked lady in her bed.

After the compulsory college-lesbian stint of working at the university library and dying her hair pink, Shan came back to the X-Men and headed up the libraries at the X-Mansion. I’m not really sure how she manages multiple libraries AND goes on world-saving missions: Willing suspension of disbelief, my friends. Willing suspension of disbelief.

I never really got into DC comics as a kid. I was a Marvel girl. I totally would have shirked off the gritty streets of Gotham for the bright spandex of New York or San Francisco any day. That is, until I read Birds of Prey. I had to check it out because, hey, it was a group composed entirely of lady superheroes. Their leader, Barbara Gordon, is known as Oracle and is probably the most brilliant good-guy in the DC Universe. She is also a librarian! Story goes, Barbara used to be Batgirl until she was shot and paralyzed by the Joker. Though now in a wheelchair, she leads a team from behind her massive computer and gigantic brain. Basically, Barbara serves as the information hub for Gotham’s superhero elite. I personally like it when she wears a headset. Now that’s some nice techie-librarian styles.

Yes, ALA, Librarians ARE heroes every day! In fact, I believe more than one student has told me that before, and technically I’ve only been a librarian for about six months. And as Barbara Gordon teaches us, we can also be vigilantes and kick ass.

Has anyone seen this?  Apparently, The Librarians is an Australian television show that sounds a lot like The Office, only in a public library rather than in a paper distributor. The DVDs are Region 4, so no chance of this coming to Netflix. Does anyone have access to this? I’d love to check it out… Here are some choice quotes from the website:

“I run a public library. You don’t think I see the misfits and idiots that come through that system?”

“This library generates more bad publicity than a crack den.”

As I am typing this post my boyfriend is destroying the stacks of the New York Public Library with his Photon Wand. Any minute now an Ethereo-Spatial Rift (a portal to an alternate dimension) will open up in the middle of the reading room, leading to Eleanor Twitty’s murderer. Eleanor Twitty, former head-librarian and current library spook, appeared in the first Ghostbusters movie terrifying children everywhere with her shushing and banshee-like scream. The “Grey Lady” has returned in the new GhostBusters video game to seek revenge on the man who killed her and she is creepier than ever. The game devotes an entire “level” to the Eleanor Twitty mystery and it is awesome! As a Ghostbuster cadet you have the opportunity to explore several floors of the New York Public Library, including a nightmarish children’s library with haunted puppet theater and whispering ghost children and an archive room stacked with boxes, while hunting Twitty ,as she glides through the stacks. The game is beautifully designed and full of minute details like Read posters on the walls and book conveyor belts in the basement.

I must admit, blasting the books off of the shelves does look kind of fun–especially since I know I wont be the one who has to re-shelve them. Don’t forget to ShockBlast the book-bats on the way out.

Unfortunately, all the quick wit and hysterical surreality is completley missing from this new show. And , to top it all off, they have a weird, mean librarian who manages to combine all that is bad about the old librarian stereotype of a crotchety spinster, with  the new NYTimes, bored hipster stereotype of the  “new librarian”.  Helen Klench , like this show, could be really funny, a cutting edge commentary on us all. She is not though and neither is the show. Shame!

Helen Klench

Email I received from a work study student last Friday night. All the names (except my own) have been changed to protect their identities…

—–Original Message—-

Sent: Friday, April 17, 2009 5:53 PM

Subject: late night journal entry, april 13th – library detective

the particular case involves a certain PATRON. 0900 hours, or near about, PATRON purportedly received an email from candise (once head librarian, possibly with vendetta, worth looking into) regarding overdue library volumes.

those volumes are: 2905, 2838, 3691 and 4849. a search of the shelves revealed that, indeed, they were not returned and/or reshelved.

possible scenario: materials were dropped off. they sat at the library front desk waiting to be checked in. culprit snatches materials, easily placing them into book bag without anyone noticing (most are engrossed in internet activities, supposedly academic . . . but doubtful, probably myspace, emails and blogs). might behoove me to pose as student and skulk through library on the look-out for any suspicious book-snatching behavior. here’s the scene as described by a mr. WORK STUDY (unscrupulous character by the look of his sunken face and overly-slick mode of dress) (note: never trust a man with a pointy beard). PATRON enters the library around 1630 hours, april 13th, visibly upset – “but,” quote, “handlin’ it cool like she had nothin’ to worry about,” end quote. she informs mr. WORK STUDY of her belief that she had returned all materials borrowed from the library and of her surprise over receiving aforementioned overdue materials email. mr. WORK STUDY proceeded to look up her account in inmagic database and recite list of materials ascribed overdue. that’s when things got messy, like a book with all its pages torn out, words gone wild. PATRON denied knowledge of materials or ever having borrowed them (!). cooly, too coo-o-o-o-o-ly to be completely trusted, WORK STUDY said, quote, “no worries. there’s probably a good explanation for this. i’ll refer this matter to LIBRARIAN and she’ll take care of things,” end quote. (note: must look further into this LIBRARIAN character as she holds key position in the library hierarchy – no one is without scrutiny) strategy: wait, be ‘cool’ as mr. WORK STUDY would say, let culprit – LIBRARIAN, candise, WORK STUDY, unknown third party or even PATRON herself (!) – make next move. must be diligent. cannot let mistake slip by unseen. end entry.

Dreamboat.